Third Trimester Pregnancy Update at 28 Weeks

Today marks the start of my third trimester.  I’m not sure what I’m in for as I’ve heard it’s different and I might experience some unpleasant pregnancy symptoms.  Not so much the nausea of the first trimester but maybe more bloating and aches and pains since I’m getting bigger.  I guess there’ll be a discomfort with carrying the extra weight but I honestly have no idea how it’ll go.

So far I can say that there’ve definitely been some changes since the last time I did a pregnancy update.  I now wear a Kotex panty liner all the time.  It just saves me some discomfort and I don’t have to change my underwear three times a day.  The increase in discharge is something I didn’t know about until it started happening but my Pregnancy Newborn Magazine did mention it in a small section about the unpleasant side of being pregnant.  They actually did suggest using a light days panty liner to help save you some laundry duty.  My linea nigra is now all the way up to my belly button.  It hasn’t gone past it but it’s up to it.  My tummy is still hairy and the hair is actually getting kind of long but I’m just going to leave it there until it falls out on its own after birth.  And my tummy is still itchy sometimes.

My belly bump is nice and round.  I think it’s kind of fun looking.  It was slightly raised off to my right side for a while, uneven looking but has kind of balanced out now.  I think the baby is definitely sitting sideways.  I can feel very light taps to the left and hard kicking off to the right.  The kicks can be really strong.  One time I had my hand by my side and I got kicked so hard it pushed my hand away.  It also distinctly feels like a foot print pushing against me.  And I can see my tummy moving now when the baby moves around.  Sometimes it can look like a wave rolling across my stomach.

I definitely feel the baby moving every day.  Almost all the time now.  There will be a few periods of a couple hours of no movement when it’s likely sleeping, there’ll be taps here and there and then there’ll be full blown awake movement for a few hours.  I’ve definitely noticed a pattern that the baby has the most movement at 10pm and 6am.  Everyday at 10pm the baby just starts moving all around and it can last 2-3 hours.  I’m often woken up at 6am because of all the movement and unable to go back to sleep.  The baby doesn’t seem to like it when I sleep on my side.  If I sleep on my left side I feel tap tap tapping.  If I roll over to my right side I feel constant kicking, like the baby is trying to kick off and turn me over.  I have to move myself to the living room couch to get comfortable.  The baby is fine if I sleep on my back and I always wake up on my back even though I heard you aren’t supposed to.  The couch is more comfortable for laying on my back anyway and my head is propped up a bit to which helps with all the acid reflux.

Joe often comes to bed late and usually feels the baby moving before he goes to sleep.  He says that the baby is very active when I’m asleep almost like it rolling over.  The most active he’s ever felt so it seems to be awake at night and sleep during the day.  I think we can pretty much predict that it’s going to sleep during the day and be awake at night after it’s born.  It already has a sleeping pattern in the womb.  My sleep schedule is up in the air.  Sometimes I sleep through the night and sometimes I wake up at 6am and have to move to the couch because I can’t get comfortable.

I’ve been told that I look really good for how far along I am.  I basically look pretty much the same just with a belly but sometimes from the front I can’t even tell I’m pregnant.  Joe says I look like an actress playing a pregnant woman where they just wear a fake belly.  We were in the store and the sales person didn’t even know I was pregnant.  We were buying things for the baby and she asked if I just had a baby.  When I told her I was six months, she was like “Wow, you look great for six months.  I wish I looked like that.”  I’m glad I got my weight under control and am doing really healthy.  It’s really nice to hear that you still look good when you’re pregnant.

I'm trying the new SheaMoisture Stretch Mark Butter Cream.  I did like the Palmer’s Tummy Butter and it did seem to be working.  The stretch marks I had weren’t getting any better but they weren’t getting any worse either and no new ones have shown up.  The only problem I had with it is that it never seemed to fully absorb into the skin so I had an oily substance on my belly all day and night.  With the SheaMoisture, it definitely does absorb into the skin after a couple of hours.  It’s too soon for me to tell if it’s working as well or not but I do really like the smell although it’s a little potent.  The Palmer’s smelled like Cocoa butter but it wasn’t overpowering and faded over time.  The SheaMoisture smells like pistachios (there’s pistachio oil in it) but the smell is strong and lasts all day.  It’s not a bad smell but definitely noticeable.  Joe noticed that I smelled different right away and he has a bad sense of smell.  I do imagine I might get sick of the smell over time so I think I’m going to alternate between the two.  Maybe only apply the Palmer’s before bed so I don’t have to walk around all day with an oily tummy.  I’m also still using the plain coconut oil before I shower (it’s just regular grocery store straight up coconut oil).  I’m also still using my collagen facial masks and creams though not nearly as often.  Only when I think my eyes look weathered.  I’m not that crazy about the eye masks.  I don’t think they’re doing much.  But I do like the L’Oreal Paris Collagen face cream.  I use it maybe once a week.

The most obnoxious thing that’s started happening is the heartburn/acid reflux.  I’ve mentioned it before but it seems to be happening at least once every day.  It can happen at any time.  It could happen when I haven’t eaten or had anything to drink in hours and I’m just sitting at my computer or on the couch.  It can happen if I bend over to pick something up randomly.  It can happen when I’m laying down trying to sleep at night (this was the most common occurrence for a while).  Or if I have a drink of water.  I guess the baby is big now so your organs and stomach are all squished up inside you so your stomach holds less and it’s easier for stuff to come up.  Most of the time I feel the burn in my chest and the burning in the back of my throat.  Sometimes some acid will just jump up into my throat, usually when I bend down to pick something up.

Cravings have been few.  I was on a bagel kick for a while.  Then I wanted some fruit juice.  I was suddenly super thirsty and craving fruit juice.  Joe went to Trader Joe’s to get me some organic fruit juice at 9pm when I had my craving.  He’s also gone in the morning to get me bagels more than once.  I still find it sweet that he’s helping to satisfy my cravings.  I am being weary of fruit juice because I don’t want to gain too fast again so I’m sticking with organic fruit juice without any additives.  Trader Joe’s has a pretty good selection.  My appetite has been low if anything.  I usually have a big lunch and then don’t feel hungry for the rest of the day.  It’s kind of the same way I was pre-pregnancy where I don’t really get super hungry and I get full pretty fast so I don’t need to eat a lot.  I’m just trying to keep variety and healthier stuff in my diet though I’m still having a major sweet tooth and not doing as well as I could be.

My frequency of going to the bathroom is entirely dependent on how much I have to drink.  If I drink I lot I’ll typically have to go once an hour but if I just drink normally I can go a few hours without having to go.  It’s no big deal but holding it is kind of tough.  It’s best to go whenever you have to go and not try to hold it.  I’ve already mentioned my milk leaking in previous entries.  I woke up recently with milk drop stains on both nipples on my nightgown so I guess it’s happening more regularly now.  So far it’s happened four times but I don't think that warrants breast pads or anything.

The greatest news about the third trimester is that if anything should happen and the baby is born early it has over a ninety percent chance of survival.  It’s kind of scary and somewhat negative to think about but I’m happy and relieved to know that the baby will most likely be okay if anything were to happen early labor-wise.

Feeling Emotional

For some reason I just got really emotional today.  I went to get donuts with my friend this morning.  She and another one of my close friends are throwing me a baby shower.  She asked about maybe throwing it at my place and they’d take care of food and decorations or at a tea place I like.  She also asked for the guest list so they could move forward soon.  I had started on the guest list a couple days ago and was super excited that my best friend since high school was going to come out for it.  I was really looking forward to spending time with her and hanging out one last time before becoming a mom.  However, she texted me later saying that she wouldn’t be able to make it.  Financially it isn’t possible right now and she’d rather come later in the Spring so she could meet the baby and help me out.  I wasn’t sure how I felt.  One the one hand I was disappointed she couldn’t come but then I understand she can only fly out here once and she wants to meet the baby plus financially it isn’t a good time for her right now.  I only see her once every few years since she lives on the east coast.  She wants to come out in May now.  It’s going to be very hectic the first three months after the baby is born so I’m not even sure how much time I’d get to spend with her while she’s visiting.

Then I realized after going over my baby shower guest list that since she can’t make it, besides Joe’s family, I only have three friends and a couple acquaintances on my list and two of them are hosting the baby shower.  That made me really sad and I started crying… a lot.  I used to have a very close friend out here in LA but she and I had a falling out right before I got pregnant and she got married (it’s a long story but she changed into someone else and I really grew to hate the new person she had become).  We were friends for seven years and pretty close before all that happened.  For the first time I was sad that we were no longer friends.  I spent most of the time being angry at her for her behavior and the things she said to me.  And I thought I was pretty much over it because I stopped thinking about her as much and she was just becoming a faded memory.  But then I guess I started feeling lonely because I only had a few close friends that meant a lot to me.  I would never want to be friends with her ever again.  She betrayed me in the worst possible way by using personal information and my insecurities as a method to verbally attack me.  She was someone I trusted and she used that trust for the sole purpose of being spiteful and hurtful.  She never apologized or admitted any wrong doing and in fact tried to justify the things she said to me when I gave her the opportunity to apologize and patch things up.  So she really isn’t the person I thought she was.  It’s always been hard for me to make friends because I have a hard time connecting with and trusting people.  Opening up to people is hard and I know it stems from my abusive childhood.  I was able to protect myself growing up by closing myself off emotionally from my parents and siblings and any relationship that was unhealthy for me.  But it also made it harder to open up to people. I’ve tried to make friends at work and at my fitness classes but it just seems like nobody likes me. 

On top of that, I have no family of my own to invite.  All my family is on the east coast but I don’t really get along with any of them.  My parents are abusive and horrible.  My sister was abusive and horrible to me basically my whole life until after I graduated college.  We are civil with each other now but we live in totally different worlds (not just geographically).  Plus, I honestly don’t think she or my brother care about me at all.  They have their own lives to live and neither one of them ever bother to contact me.  When I tried to have relationships with them and sent them Christmas presents and cards, there was never any return or acknowledgement.  They just don’t care.

I knew that going into motherhood was going to be harder for me simply because I didn’t have any family support.  I never did.  I grew up alone taking care of myself and that’s just fine.  I did feel saddened by the fact that my kids would never have any fun uncles or aunts for grandparents to spend time with who would love them.  I did struggle with whether or not it would be selfish to have children that would be deprived of those experiences.  But I had some very strong close friendships that I felt would be enough.  I guess losing one friend and knowing another won’t be there was enough for me to lose it a little today.

To top it off I felt even worse for feeling so bad about it which made me cry even more.  I have so much to be happy and thankful for.  A loving and supportive husband.  A healthy baby on the way.  I was able to quit a very stressful demanding job I had to be a full-time mom (I know not many people are so lucky and privileged).  I only have a few close friends but the friends I have are amazing and supportive and caring.  My husband just bought me a car and we’re doing well enough financially that we can get whatever we need for the baby and support ourselves just fine.  I have two awesome friends who care about me and want to throw me a baby shower.  It made me feel selfish and whiney.  I did talk to my friend who’s hosting the shower about my feelings and she suggested I open up to inviting more people even if I’m not super close to them because they probably do care and I have a lot of support here.  I did feel better after talking to her. 

Maybe it’s just pregnancy hormones.  I don’t ever let my family background get to me emotionally because I view it as a sign of weakness.  I’m strong enough that I don’t need them.  There’s nothing more pathetic to me than traumatized adults that act like children because mommy and daddy never loved them.  Some people go through life honestly not understanding that some parents just don’t give a shit about their kids.  Love isn’t a given just because there’s shared DNA involved.  So your parents never loved you.  You can cry and be sad about it your whole life and keep trying to prove to them that you’re worthy of their love which they’ll never give you, or you can move on and surround yourself with healthy positive relationships with people that do love and care about you.  You are in charge of your own happiness and your own life choices.  It’s nobody else’s job to make your life easier or make you happy.  I know that.  And honestly I am really happy and have been for years.  I just had this one moment where I let it get to me.  Small things can seem very overwhelming at times but you just need to put them into perspective.

Glucose Test for Gestational Diabetes

Today I went to Quest Diagnostics for my glucose test.  They gave me a small bottle to drink.  It was clear and looked like water but tasted like Mountain Dew.  It tasted ever so slightly carbonated.  I had to drink it within five minutes and then wait one hour before they could draw blood. After drinking it, the baby started moving.  Joe was with me and could see my stomach visibly moving around underneath my shirt.  They took four tubes of blood this time but it went just fine.  I didn’t get faint or anything.  The lady doing it was pretty nice and actually talked to me.  She asked if the baby started moving after the drink and said most women all say babies react to the drink with movement.  I guess they can taste all the sugar.  Or maybe it gives them a boost.

After the test, Joe and I went and got lunch.  Then we went to check out Buy Buy Baby.  I got some coupons in the mail and kind of wanted to check it out and see if there was anything we wanted to buy with them.  Plus, I’d heard it’s a pretty good store to shop in for all things baby and I’d never been there before.  The store was nice and had a lot of stuff.  Basically anything you could need for your baby.  We toured the store taking note of all the things we might need or would want to buy.  We decided to use the coupons on a Sleep Sheep (something I heard is a must in order to get the baby to go to sleep) and a Fisher Price Calming Seas Projection Soother.  The Sleep Sheep has whale, ocean, rain and heartbeat sounds.  The Calming Seas Projector looks like a little play fish tank with a fish and seahorse that go around inside and has music, ocean and white noise sounds.  Plus it projects a calming blue pattern out of the top and onto the ceiling.  I liked the music and thought the fish tank would match well with the baby’s turtle nursery.  Joe also wanted to get a little Oball rattle for the baby that was approved for ages 0+.  It’s hard to resist wanting to buy things for the baby.  Everything is so cute!

There were a lot of toys and books to look at in the store.  In the feeding section I found an organic baby food called Earth’s Best, which doesn’t appear to contain any additives.  It’s just the purees and water.  I plan to make our own baby food but it’s good to know there’s a good option out there and we’ll probably need some already prepared baby food on hand at times.  When the time comes I’m definitely going to go with that.

I also found a new stretch mark cream in the skincare isle.  It’s called SheaMoisture Mommy Stretch Mark Butter Cream.  It smelled so good, like pistachios.  I was interested in trying a new one because the Palmer’s Tummy Butter I’ve been using doesn’t really absorb into the skin.  It just leaves an oily residue on my belly all day.  I’m hoping this one, which seems to have good reviews, absorbs better into the skin.  I like the smell of the Palmer’s too though (it’s like cocoa butter) and it seems to be working as I haven’t noticed any new stretch marks.  I’ll try this new one for a bit and see.  Or maybe I’ll alternate between the two.

When I got home I leaked some more milk.  It is definitely leaking out.  I was sitting at my computer and I felt wet around my right nipple, I looked down and then looked at it and could see the milk leaking out.  Mystery solved.  I think my left nipple may have leaked a couple days ago when I was sleeping because when I woke up I noticed a stain on my pajamas that looked exactly like the previous one.  It’s not a lot, just a few drops but still weird and also a bit interesting. 

Crib Assembly

Joe assembled the crib for the baby today.  I only helped a little by holding things while he screwed in all the bolts.  It didn’t seem that difficult for him to build but the instructions weren’t super clear.  Once the crib was assembled we put all the baby bedding in.  I had washed it a couple days prior.  I do realize we still have three months and I’ll likely have to wash it again before the baby gets here or we’ll have to put a sheet over it to preserve it from dust but I just couldn’t wait to get it set up.  Plus, I kind of want to do some maternity pictures in the nursery once it’s fully set up.  We still have to assemble the dresser and changing table that comes with our Storkcraft Turin nursery but we’ll do those another day.  One thing at a time.

For the bedding, I got the CoCaLo Turtle Reef bedding set.  I guess it might seem a little more boy oriented but it could be for either gender.  It has a crib sheet, crib skirt, quilt, wall hangings, diaper stacker, window valance and bumpers.  I’ll have to put up all the wall hangings once all the furniture is built.  It was a little pricey but it’s kind of like buying things for your wedding.  I mean, how often are you going to have a baby?  I love turtles and really wanted to do the nursery in ocean theme.  It’s already really cute, full of pictures of turtles and fish.  I heard mixed reviews on crib bumpers.  That they can be dangerous if the baby gets caught underneath them and suffocates but also that you should have them to prevent the baby from rolling over and slamming its head into the crib rails.  It was part of the set so we’ll try to use them.  We made sure to tuck them partially under the mattress to make sure they’re secure.  However, they have ties to the crib instead of velcro straps so getting them on and off is kind of a hassle. You have to wash the baby’s sheets at least once a week and Joe predicts we’re not going to want to keep taking them off and putting them back on every single time we have to wash the laundry.

Cord Blood Banking vs. Delayed Cord Cutting

Joe and I have been looking into our options regarding our baby’s cord blood.  At first I just wanted to donate it figuring it could help someone in need.  Joe thought maybe it would be a good investment to bank it.  However, there’s no history of cancers, blood disorders or genetic diseases in either of our families so I don’t really see a point in spending thousands of dollars to bank something that might never be needed.  I think he thinks of it as an insurance policy and worries that if something ever did happen and we had the option or ability to help our baby in the future, we should.  However, there’s no real guarantee that it’ll actually cure anything.  It would just be used for treatment.

During our childbirth class the lecturer mentioned delayed clamping.  Apparently the placenta has one third of the baby’s blood still in it and you can wait up to 3 minutes after birth (or until the placenta stops pulsing) before cutting the cord to make sure your baby gets all of its blood.  Studies have shown it’s very beneficial to for the baby’s health to have all of its blood since it’ll have more red blood cells, stem cells and immune cells.  Plus, studies have also shown better neurodevelopment in babies with delayed clamping.  The only risk seems to be a higher rate of jaundice.

Some cord banks claim you can do both but it seems very unlikely.  Most doctors and midwives I’ve read articles from say you cannot do both (there’s a pretty good article called Confessions of a Vampire Midwife about cord blood collection).  The minimum amount of blood needed for collection is 45mls.  That’s the equivalent to three bottles of nail polish and that’s only the minimum amount.  I honestly think cord blood banks are just saying that you can do both hoping you’ll pay them to store your cord blood even if the sample is insufficient.  Clearly they'd want more than the minimum for a donation.

Joe said we should just ask our doctor on the next visit but I think I’m pretty set on the delayed clamping.  Since we have to choose between the two, it seems that would be the most beneficial.  If our families had histories of cancer or genetic diseases I might lean more toward banking but I just don’t think it’s that necessary for us. 

Christmas With Family

Joe took me to breakfast at Hungry Fox (a breakfast/lunch place near us that we really like).  Later on we went over to his brother and sister-in-laws house for Christmas.  They had a lot of family over so we were all just hanging out and socializing.  Whenever we go over they always have a ton of food so I kind of ended up eating way too much.  I was still full from breakfast but I ate a lot anyway.  I ended up just falling asleep on the couch.  I guess I just got really tired so we decided to leave.  They always give us tons of food to take with us too we now have a fridge full of leftovers.

Bagels For Breakfast

I had been craving bagels for breakfast for a few days.  I haven’t had a bagel since I stopped working (my old company had bagels every morning).  To my surprise, Joe got me some.  He was dropping off some equipment in the morning but on his way back he brought some bagels from Western Bagel where they cook them fresh.  That was a nice treat and very sweet of him.

Seventh Prenatal Dr Visit

I had my seventh prenatal appointment today.  Joe couldn’t come with me because he was working and with the Holiday scheduling I could only get an appointment in the middle of the afternoon.  The doctor just checked the baby’s heart rate.  148bpm, regular and nothing out of the ordinary.  She also weighed me.  I’m at 150lbs which is good.  According to her my weight gain is finally okay and not too much so I guess I’ve been doing better.  It’s kind of weird because my scale at home reads between 146 and 148 but the Dr’s office scale is always much higher.  This is the last time I’ll see my regular Dr since she’s leaving for her maternity leave.  She says she hopes to be back in time to deliver my baby but I have a feeling she won’t be.  I also have a strong feeling the baby is going to come in early March.  They made me an appointment with one of the partners in her practice for next month.  And I’m supposed to get a glucose/diabetes test so I have to go back to Quest Diagnostics.  I’m actually not really thrilled with that place.  Their customer service is horrible.  But I’ll get it done next week.

Acid Reflux Getting Worse

This acid reflux is driving me nuts.  It can come any time and last for any amount of time.  It seems to happen at random.  Usually hours after I’ve eaten.  I’ll just be sitting on the couch and for no reason some stomach acid will come up.  Or I’ll feel that acidic burning the back of my throat.  Or I’ll bent over and then some will come up.  I’ve tried Tums when it lasts a long time but they don’t help much.  It often doesn’t last for more than an hour or so but sometimes it can last hours.  I get it at night while laying down which makes it hard to sleep and I also get it when I’m just sitting on the couch.  I guess it’s better than having nausea but it doesn’t feel great and it’s just getting super annoying.

Charley Horse

I woke up with a really bad Charley Horse in my left leg.  At the Childbirth class, the presenter told us that early contractions are painful like a Charley Horse and then later in labor they are like a Charley Horse times ten.  This Charley Horse was really painful.  I decided to try out the breathing techniques I learned in class to try and use it for labor training.  It was really hard because it hurt so bad and lasted a really long time.  I woke Joe up with my breathing and he came over and massaged my back as if practicing for my labor himself.  The deep breaths helped but the quicker/shorter ones didn’t really help much at all.  You’re not supposed to take deep breaths except at the start and end of a contraction because you’re taking in a lot of oxygen and can get light headed.  The short breaths didn’t help much at all because it really freaking hurt and the Charley Horse seemed to last for freaking ever.  It was a good practice run but I really don’t feel confident in my ability to manage pain when I go into labor.  Especially since it’s likely going to last 12-18 hours.  My leg muscles were sore for the rest of the day because of it and I’m honestly not feeling to confident about this whole labor thing.

Date Night

Joe and I had a nice date night.  We went to eat at Cheesecake Factory.  I like Cheesecake Factory but we hadn’t been there in years.  The menu is huge with almost too many choices.  We decided to get an appetizer and then split a main dish.  Their portion sizes are huge (more than enough for two people).  We got the spinach and artichoke cheese dip (I love spinach and artichoke dip) for the appetizer.  It came with toasted pita chips but they seemed burned and some were pretty stale.  It was okay but not as good as other ones I’ve had.  My favorite was Chili’s but the don’t make it anymore.  Then we split a parmesan crusted chicken with mashed potatoes and green beans.  It was actually three pieces of chicken so even split between the two of us we still had some leftover.  We didn’t get any dessert.  Cheesecake Factory cheesecakes are so rich you can eat one piece for an entire week and we were going to see a movie so we didn’t want to have to take anything with us.  Plus, we were pretty full.  My favorite used to be white chocolate peanut butter truffle cheesecake but they don’t make it anymore.  I prefer lighter cheesecakes to the heavier ones.  Ones that have cake layers mixed in are usually less bloating and rich.  I also like the red velvet cheesecake or any of the ones that have chocolate cake layers inside.  Yum.  Now I’m wondering if we should have gotten some cheesecake.

After dinner we went to see Star Wars.  Joe got us isle seats so it would be easy for me to get up and go to the bathroom.  I know I’m not going to last two plus hours without having to go at least once.  I’m not a Star Wars fan per say but I did really enjoy the movie.  It had great acting, great characters, an interesting story and exciting action.  I really liked it. 

Christmas Party

Joe, my friend Kate and I threw a Christmas Party at my place.  I baked some cookies and brownies in preparation yesterday.  The cookies were instant Pillsbury with snowmen designs on them.  I wanted something simple and festive.  I turned the brownies into Christmas trees by cutting them into triangles and making green frosting to swirl over them with star sprinkles on the very top.  They looked cute but it was hard to cut and mold them since they were moist and kept falling apart.  When I got home I made sliders with King’s Hawaiian Roll buns and Spanakopitas (Trader Joe’s brand so I just had to heat them up).  Originally I was going to make some more stuff but I just didn’t have time.  Kate made gingerbread cupcakes with molasses frosting, candied pecans and a mulled wine.  I heated up some hot apple cider in my crockpot.  Last time nobody really drank any of the soda or beer so I just put out the alcohol we had leftover from the Halloween party and only bought one liter of Coke.  Lots of people came and nearly everything got eaten up.  The Coke went quickly and there wasn’t anything really to mix the alcohol with.  I guess I should have gotten more soda but it’s hard to predict what people are going to drink.  I got an elf shirt to wear (XL to fit over my belly) but it was funny because I didn’t really look six months pregnant.  From the front you almost couldn’t even really tell.  Someone even said to me, they forgot I was pregnant until I turned to the side and they could see the bump but they didn’t notice it from the front.  Joe put up Christmas lights  around the house in addition to our tree and replaced the hall and kitchen lights with red and green bulbs so the lighting was nice.  I got so tired I went to bed at 2am before all the guests even left. It was really fun but I definitely think this is our last party for a while.

Childbirth Class Part 2

We had part two of our Childbirth Preparation Class at Valley Presbyterian Hospital.  We saw a birth videos that went over two types of pain medications.  Narcotics and epidurals.  The narcotic basically makes the mother high and affects the baby.  It only lasts for two to three hours but it doesn’t slow labor and you can still feel the contractions so you know when to push.  However, the baby will be affected and born sleepy/less alert.  The epidural is administered by an anesthesiologist and injected into the spinal cord.  It lasts hours and numbs your pain but it can slow your labor because you can’t feel the contractions, however it doesn’t affect the baby.  The woman presenting the info suggested waiting on the epidural until you’re 6cm dilated because it’ll have less of a chance of slowing your labor.  I liked the pain medication birth videos better.  The women seemed calmer, more alert and happier.  Last week’s no pain video just looked agonizing.  Then we saw a c-section video but it was an animation that just explained the process.  I honestly don’t think there’s anything wrong with c-sections.  They’re so common I heard one in three babies are delivered that way and they are the most performed surgery in America.  People are always scared of them but I honestly don’t think it’s anything to worry about.

The presenter also talked about forceps (which she said she’d rather have a c-section than risk the damage that forceps can cause), vacuums (which cause your baby to have a cone head that can last for months to a year), and episiotomies.  I really don’t want to have any of those.  I’m praying my child’s delivery goes smoothly and I don’t need any surgical assistance.  Joe and I actually did come up with a birth plan.  When I go into labor we’re going to try to wait until I’m 6cm dilated before I get the epidural.  If there’s any complications we’ll go with the c-section.  I’m definitely refusing the forceps and vacuum options. 

She also went over inducing labor if the doctor manually breaks the water (she claims it doesn’t speed up labor at all but again, she’s biased).  Apparently, her doctor had suggested she induce labor when her baby was 8lbs but she refused.  The baby was born 10lbs and because of its huge size she had a very long and difficult time with her labor that needed an episiotomy.  I’m fine with inducing.  If the baby’s big enough to come out, why beat around the bush?  It’ll just be harder to push out the bigger it is.  Plus, there’s a danger of the baby pooping inside the womb and breathing it into its lungs it if you wait too long after your due date and that can lead to complications. 

We did our breathing exercises again but this time she made us hold ice cubes to give us some discomfort while doing so we could get an idea of having to concentrate through the pain.  We also touched on diaper changing, breastfeeding, burping and swaddling.  She recommends figuring out the baby’s eating pattern so you can get used to feeding it before it gets to the stage of crying out of hunger which isn’t good.  She mentioned that most women’s waters break at the hospital.  You’re supposed to head to the hospital at 5-1-1.  When you have contractions 5 minutes apart for 1 minute each and it lasts 1 hour.  If your water breaks at home it should be clear with no smell.  If it’s green like pea soup the baby pooped and may have inhaled some so you have to get to the hospital immediately.  Also she said 60-75 percent of women poop during labor so I guess it’s very likely to happen.  She also went over the underwear and pads that you’ll get at the hospital.  Apparently they have huge pads with ice packs on the bottom to help with recovery and you’ll need overnight pads because you’ll have bleeding for 4-6 weeks after giving birth.  Fun…  Plus, after giving birth apparently you won’t be able to go to the bathroom by yourself so the  husbands have to help you at least for the first day.  Everything about childbirth sounds kind of horrifying but I definitely feel better prepared now.

Waves of Movement

I’ve noticed differences in the baby’s movement.  Now it feels like churning.  Like the baby’s whole body turns around.  I’ll feel a movement across my belly and see a wave go across it too.  It’s very slight but noticeable.  Kind of cool.  The baby is still kicking me on my right side but now I can swear that I feel its whole foot and sometimes leg.  It feels like a tiny foot print pushing out on my side.  It still feels the most active between 9-10pm but I feel it moving pretty much all the time now. 

Joe and I went to get our Christmas tree today.  I originally wanted to do photo Christmas cards since it’s technically the baby’s first Christmas.  However, we are really lagging behind and I don’t know if I’ll have time to do it.  I originally wanted to get the tree last week but we’ve been so busy with the car and getting the nursery/office set up, plus Joe’s work schedule we just haven’t had time.  We went to a parking lot selling trees down the street from our house but they had a poor selection at unreasonably high prices.  Their 6 foot trees were seventy five dollars and up and didn’t include the watering stand.  I wasn’t willing to pay more than fifty dollars for a Christmas tree.  We ended up going to Oregon Family trees and they had a very nice selection at super reasonable prices.  We got a 6-7 foot tree for fifty dollars which included the stand.  The tree smells amazing.  We actually feel like it’s the nicest tree we’ve ever had.  So I’m happy it worked out.  Again, it paid off to have patience, shop around and travel a little farther out of our way to get what we wanted at the price we wanted.

Itchy Tummy

My belly has started being itchy lately.  All of sudden I’ll just need to scratch it all over.  Like a monkey.  I looked it up online and once again normal.  There’s so much crap that can and does happen to a woman’s body when she’s pregnant.  They say it usually starts around 23 weeks.  They recommend moisturizing it, which I’m pretty sure my stretch mark cream and tummy butter are already supposed to be doing.  They also suggest an oatmeal bath, but I’m using that Aveeno oatmeal soap.  I guess I have skipped my tummy butter for a few days.  I just hadn’t felt like putting it on after my last few showers but I guess I should stick with it.

Even though I bought a car, I still check the Certified Used Honda site just to make sure I got the best deal, which I think I did.  However, today I noticed that Galpin Honda lowered the price of the car we were going to buy by another 500 dollars.  So now, it’s one thousand dollars cheaper in price than it was when we looked at it and were going to buy it.  I’m even more relieved that we walked away from that sale.  Knowing them, they’ll try to charge whoever tries to buy it over three thousand dollars in “fees” to try and up the price back to what it was before.  I seriously hope nobody falls for their crap and buys it.

Baby's Sleeping Pattern

Joe and I have definitely noticed the baby has a sleeping pattern.  It basically starts to get very active around 9-10pm.  It’ll be quiet during the day and then moving like crazy all around at night.  Joe even told me he felt the baby moving after I had fallen asleep and it was thumping around like crazy and he swears he felt like a shoulder or arm turning over.  The baby’s movements often wake me up super early, like a 4am.  I think that’s when it’s the most active.  So I’ll be woken up for a little bit but then end up going back to sleep.  I have the feeling the baby is going to be the same when it comes out.  Up all night and sleeping during the day.

Joe unpacked the baby’s nursery.  It was a set with a crib, dresser and changing table.  Our plan was to have it assembled tonight but it took nearly all night to get it all unpacked.  I got the Storkcraft Turin Nursery in a Box set from Target.  It was packed in so much foam, the foam made a huge mess and got all over everything in our entire living room.  We had to spend hours vacuuming up the foam.  It was tiny pieces that just stuck to everything.  Joe got a hand vacuum and just vacuumed all the pieces and the box constantly as he pulled things out.  By the time we got everything unpacked and cleaned up, it was way too late and we were way too tired to assemble anything.  I still think we’re going to meet our goal of having it assembled and ready to go by the end of this month but we just placed all the unassembled furniture in the nursery for now.

Carpet Cleaning

I hired some carpet cleaners to clean the baby’s room before we set up the nursery.  I already have the crib and mattress and bedding (though we still have to put it together) but I wanted the carpet professionally cleaned before we did any of that.  They came right on time and it didn’t take very long at all but the floor needs 24 hours to dry before we can move any furniture back on it.  Right now everything that was in that room is piled up in our living room.  It looks a mess, like a hoarder’s home.  I can’t wait to get everything settled back in.  Joe’s already gotten rid of and moved a lot of things from our spare office room to his professional office down the street.  So it’s just a matter of him setting up his small half of the room and then getting the nursery set up.

Updating Insurance and Cell Phone Plans

We went to AAA to update our insurance to include the new car.  We cancelled my individual plan and added me to Joe’s plan for a combined plan with both cars on it.  We had planned to do that sooner after we had gotten married but buying the new car gave us more of a reason to get it taken care of.  We also opted for a slightly better plan than we had before since the car is newer and we’re going to be driving around with a baby in it.  We just wanted to make sure we had adequate coverage.  It was actually really nice to talk to the rep from AAA.  He wasn’t trying to sell us anything or get us to sign up for anything.  He just explained the different options and let us pick.  It was such a breath of fresh air and low stress compared to the nightmare of having to buy a car.

After we got the car insurance sorted out, we went to get our cell phones taken care of.  I had an iPhone 4 which was pretty outdated and now that I’m a stay at home mom I barely use any data at all and don’t really need anything.  Joe just decided to add me to his plan.  He’s with ATT but he hates them because their customer service is awful and they keep screwing up his billing and service.  We went to T-Mobile to see if they had any good options but they didn’t.  ATT told him if he upgraded his plan, added me and bought a new phone he could get a phone for me for free.  His old iPhone is really broken so he needed a new one anyway.  He opted to get a Samsung since he hates the iPhone and I just stuck with the iPhone and got a 6.  My old phone literally just broke.  It makes noises like it’s on but the screen is black and won’t turn on.  They said I could keep my old number if I had the account number they would transfer it but since I didn’t have the info on hand I just opted for a new number.  I was with Verizon but I just wanted a new number anyway.  Joe really wanted me to keep the same one but I don’t get that many calls anyway.  The sales rep swore up and down my phone was free but we’d be billed the first three months for it and then refunded.  When we got home I realized that we didn’t have a printed contract with the receipt stating that and now I’m worried they’re going to try and charge us for my phone.  I’m really not trusting any salesmen these days.  It’s like everyone’s trying to trick us into paying more for something.

Feeling Bloated and Tired

I was just feeling really big and tired today.  I think I’m starting to feel the weight of my belly because it feels heavy.  I guess the baby itself is only a pound or so but with all the water it’s more.  I feel bloated and full of water.  I also feel really tired today.  My stomach just feels really big and full and heavy.  I like sitting in the recliner since it feels more comfortable.

Car Shopping Concluded

Once we got home, I checked the car listings again and found another one.  It was a 2014 with 10K miles on it for just under 16K.  It was the same car we were going to buy with less mileage for less money.  I called to make sure it was still there and we went to see it.  It was at Carson Honda though which was really far away (a little over an hour drive in LA rush hour).  Once we got there and looked at it/test drove it we decided to try to see if we could get it.  We were prepared to deal with more annoying lying salesmen but the deal went surprisingly easy and well.  We told them we had cash and they didn’t really try to push a loan on us.  The first manager told us he couldn’t lower the final price by more than a couple hundred bucks but we told them it we couldn’t do the price they were asking.  He went and got a second manager who gave us an offer at 1K less which was in our budget and even 100 dollars less than we agreed to pay at Galpin so we said yes.  It took forever to get the papers signed because there was only one contracts person there but we got it and drove it home.  Now we have a car.  The one I wanted with better mileage at a better price!  And honestly they were the easiest sales people we’ve dealt with all week.  It went surprisingly smooth.  I’m glad that doing the right thing (walking away from a crooked sale and being patient) really paid off.

Childbirth Class Part 1

Joe and I went to a childbirth class at Valley Presbyterian Hospital.  It’s a two part class over two consecutive weekends from 10-2.  Valley Pres offers a lot of free childcare and child prep classes and it’s right down the street from us so it’s perfect.  In class the instructor went over what’s happening in your body, the stages of labor, different breathing techniques, different labor and pain relieving positions, how your partner can support you and ease your labor pains, what you and your partner should do once you go into labor and what’s going to happen, etc.  She had visual aids and examples plus a power point with diagrams and illustrations.  It was all very informative and we got some free reading materials that are pretty handy.  We watched a birthing video of a vaginal delivery with no pain medication and it looked really really painful.  Just awful.  This woman looked like she was suffering for hours.  The only thing I didn’t like about the class was that the lady presenting was really biased.  She’s a home delivery doula and against pain medication.  Although I don’t think she realized it, she gave off a negative tone when talking about hospital births and using pain medication and was more positive in tone when talking about home births and no medication.  That kind of got on my nerves.  Joe asked if we should consider no pain medication and I told him straight up that isn’t even up for discussion.  I’m not going to be in excruciating unbearable pain for hours and hours just because I feel the need to prove something. 

I am extremely pro medical science.  Medical technology has extended the human lifespan by more than double.  In the dark ages women and babies died in childbirth all the time and people didn’t live past 40.  Now because of advances in the field of medicine we don’t have to worry about that almost at all.  If there is medicine that can ease your suffering why wouldn’t you use it?  If you were in pain because you broke your arm would you refuse pain medication just because “your body can handle it.”  If you could have a baby in a hospital filled with professionals that can help you in case something goes wrong, why wouldn’t you want that?  You don’t know better than a doctor who went to medical school for 8 plus years.  I get kind of annoyed by all these women who insist on having a “natural” birth like they’ve got something to prove.  In my Pregnancy Newborn Magazine they have a birth story in every issue and every single one always starts out with “I wanted a natural birth” but always ends with “I was begging for pain meds” before the delivery.  I know I love my baby.  I don’t have to prove it by needlessly being in excruciating pain for twelve to eighteen hours.  I don’t think it proves that I’m more of a woman or a better mom.  Nobody else is capable of having my baby but me.  It just gets on my nerves when people act so high and mighty about “natural birth.”  All that really matters is the health of the baby which is why I think it’s important to have a baby in a hospital where medical staff is on standby to treat you and the baby immediately if anything goes wrong.

Regardless of the instructor’s biases (she also kind of hinted that if a doctor suggests inducing labor you shouldn’t do it), the class was really great and informative.  We have the second half next Saturday where we’re going to see a vaginal birth with pain medication and a c-section delivery so that’ll be interesting.

Car Shopping Continued

I found another blue Honda Civic online.  This one was a 2015 with 13K miles listed at the same price as the 2014 Galpin one.  I called ahead to see if it was there before we headed over.  I asked the guy on the phone if he could look it up by the stock number but he said he could see it in the lot so we went over.  When we got there, it wasn’t the same car.  It was a two door Coupe.  When I showed him the print out of the car I wanted to see that I saw online he went to check and came back saying it had already been sold.  Too bad but now I know I can find another one and at a better price than Galpin had.  They apparently sell fast.  This is the second time a listing just went up for that car and it was sold before we could get there to look at it.  We looked at a couple of other colors and years of Civics that they had but I just wasn’t feeling any of them so we called it a day.

Joe and I went to have Chinese food at Green Apple, a place on Ventura.  My friend recommended it.  We had lunch there earlier that week but I had been craving Chinese Food and Jamba Juice and luckily Green Apple was directly next to a Jamba Juice.  I liked their food and I think it was sweet that Joe agreed to it eat twice in one week to satisfy my cravings. 

When we got back home I checked online again to see if there were any new listings and to my surprise Galpin Honda lowered the price of the car we were going to buy by 500 dollars.  It was literally the car we tried to buy.  What a bunch of crooks!  They kept claiming they were losing money by giving us a deal and yet now they’re now taking off an additional 500 dollars!  I’m glad their losing money on it.  It can sit in their lot for another two months for all I care.  Upon further inspection compared to other dealerships they actually charge the most.  Other places have the same or better cars with the same or better mileage at the same or lower price.  Plus, their add on taxes and fees are actually much higher than other dealerships too.  So they’re really just a bunch of scammers.

The most important thing is that we need to stick to our budget.  We know what we want.  I looked on Kelley Blue Book to see what a fair price range for what we want costs.  I compared different dealerships to see the different ranges in pricing and I know we can get the car we want for the price we can pay.  It just takes a little patience but it’s that simple.  When we had told Galpin that it was over our budget they suggested a small loan to cover the rest.  We are absolutely not doing that.  If we can’t afford it for the budget we have available we’ll buy a different car.  We are not going into debt over it and we’re not going to owe anyone money.  We have the money to buy a car.  If they can’t meet us at our budget then we won’t take it and they can sell it to someone else.  We have noticed that car dealerships are much more interested in selling you a loan than they are at selling you a car.  You think that cash is king and you’d have more leeway on pricing if you had the money ready to go but that’s not how it works anymore.  They want you to take out a loan with the hope that you’ll fail on payments so they can repossess your car and resell it again and again.  Plus, they want to make interest on it and thus make much more money than the car costs.  Dealerships are sleazy and hard to deal with but buying from a private party runs it’s own risks and we want a certified pre-owned Honda.  If I get a 2014 it’ll still be under manufacturer’s warranty.  I know we’re going to find the right car eventually.  It’s just a matter of time and patience.

Although I have to admit that this whole car buying experience is a nightmare.  Every dealership has the same tactics.  To offer you a price thousands of dollars beyond sticker for taxes and “fees” and then you give them a price and they leave for 15 minutes.  Then a manager comes back and offers you a different price.  Then you ask for another price.  Then they leave for another 15 minutes.  Then they come back with another manager to offer a price and swear up and down they’re doing all they can.  And it goes on for hours.  It’s a waste of my time and stupid.  And I know for a fact they probably spent tens of thousands of dollars on marketing research trying to figure out what tactics they can do to make you spend the most amount of money.  It actually backfired for them because leaving Joe and I alone to talk about it for 15 minutes made us decided we didn’t want it and we didn’t want to budge on price and it wasn’t worth wasting all day waiting around for so we just said no thanks.  One dealership wouldn’t even tell us the price of the car until we filled out credit check applications.  Then he tried to get us to sign an agreement on how much we could pay without even telling us the price of the car.  We refused to sign anything and got pretty mad.  All we wanted to know was the final price of the car.  They just wanted to push their loan financing on us.  All these dealerships are just sleazy, dishonest and gross.